Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Why I hate Yahoo Mail !



Every single day Mr. Abrahim Musa remembers me from 'His Desk' at International Bank of Africa and sends an email to me. He is supposedly an Auditing and Accounting Manager there. His problem is, his client has left a few million dollars in his bank and he is supposedly dead. Now he wants to be so nice as to give a piece of that to me. And he will help me establish myself as the dead man's Business Partner and help me get the money out of his bank. Very kind of him, I must say!

Also, every day, the manager of UK National Lottery is relentlessly trying to make me rich by making me win his lottery. They want all my contact information and they are so responsible that they put a notice at the end of the mail saying 'The information will be kept secret'. Secret from whom Mr Manager?

Another some Mr. Ousmane from Bank of Africa has the same problem as Mr. Musa. I wonder how so many wealthy old people died all of a sudden leaving their wealth in Bank of Africa. And this bank is in some place called OUAGADOUGOU , BURKINA FASO. Oh, by the way, Mr Musa also works at the same bank! (Surprise !!)

I don't know why Yahoo Mail's spam-guard (if there exists any) is so dumb. Every time I see one such mail, I tag it as 'Spam'. And still Yahoo Mail is not able to remember that just yesterday I had tagged this type of mail as Spam and there is not even a remote possibility that I would consider Mr. Musa's offer today after denying it for so long.

Speculations about Microsoft taking over Yahoo does not lessen my worries. I have never used Microsoft mail. And I am not sure about their anti-spam capabilities either.

I always fancy that given a chance to punish all the spammers of the world one day, I would hand out a 30 years imprisonment to every one of them. This 30 years period is significant and I have spent considerable amount of time on arriving at this number. The reasons why it has to be 30 years are manifold.

1. Spending 30 years in prison, the spammers would lose all the enthusiasm and energy to do their evil deeds of spamming innocent people like me.

2. There might be spammers whose evil may not have been eroded with time and age. But in 30 years, the technology would have changed so much that they will have hard time learning the ropes of spamming in those days.

3. And most importantly, in 30 years, I would be old enough and will not be using emails so often and thus I would not have to worry much.

P.S. while I am writing, Microsoft Promotions has sent me an email saying I have won 1 Million pounds.

4 comments:

Natasha said...

hehe totally allll echo your sentiments. Yahoo mail used to be my favorite upto sometime. then their spam filter has just not been able to keep up and i get 30-40 mails a day of spam. kudos to gmail for that. Something MS should look into, should the takeover go through :)

Karthik said...

LOL!! very well written. Definitely, Yahoo mail sucks..

Tapasya said...

Hahaha!!! Amazingly sarcastic :D

I wonder when Mr. Musa would go bankrupt (he so often chooses to offer us all a share of what his dead clients left :P)

Anonymous said...

hahaha ! u sound sooo sarcastic ! even more than how u react after reading that "management" book :P
but, like always interesting and fun read :)